Tentatively, Ari has his big skull surgery scheduled for August 23rd. However, I just found out today that his craniofacial surgeon is not in network with our new insurance (my work switched insurances starting June 1) or our secondary.  With the new insurance, I have to pay our out-of-pocket max again (so fun to do 2 months in a row) and now with the news that the main doctor is not in network, things are up in the air.

Once we got home from China, I took care of Ari’s deductible and out-of-pocket max as well as all the lawyer fees for the Arkansas re-adoption (to get his AR birth certificate) from savings I had done during the adoption process. Unfortunately, that is all gone now and being a single parents is fully in my face. Ya’ll, it is HARD!  I knew there would be times that it would be difficult, but man … never imagined the stress!

The out-of-network doctor requires 1/2 of the almost $4000 fee be paid when scheduling the surgery (aka this week) and then the other half the day before surgery … I have no idea where this money is going to come from. How do you choose between giving your child the GREATLY needed and NECESSARY surgery for them to progress in ALL skills and not going into further debt (there is already a house, car and a credit card in the mix). It is an impossible choice … one that I didn’t realize I would be making so soon. Both change the future of both of our lives … my heart is heavy and my head is spinning …. somehow it will work out, but I really have no idea how.

thanks guys for listening, this is the real part of coming home … it can be very hard, not just for the child dealing with trauma.


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